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| Ok, I know I'm not up here often... but I've joined www.myspace.com and I post on there much more often. It's fun, free, and YOU should try it!  | | |
| Well, let's just say I don't have many comments about this weekend. It was one rollercoaster of emotions and feelings though. My best friend came in to town and we had a great time together! I miss her very much and it was great to spend time with her. We went to "Howl At The Moon" with some of my guy friends and that was an absolute blast! That is the coolest place, and the guys were SO nice to Crystal and we had a great time! 2 of the people I consider my closest friends got pretty close which was awesome, however it may have done some damage on my end. My dad also came on Sunday and stayed the night. It was good to see him, but him and I are so different, that I'm glad it wasn't a prolonged visit. I am so excited to get off work tonight and go home and spend some alone time! I LOVE being social and having others over to visit, but sometimes, you just need some me time. Tonight I'll get my me time. Just me, my kitchen (I'm making chili for dinner), my couch, and the remote. A nice, quiet evening alone... unless prince charming comes knocking on my door and makes a better offer, but I highly doubt that will happen. | | |
| I’m at work, bored on my lunch break. I (of course) took this from Heather.) By the way Heather… I’ll get you to sing again in public, don’t worry! J
100 things about me:
1. First grade teacher's name: Ms. Jaquet… the coolest teacher alive.
2. Last person you kissed: ha ha ha. All I’ll say is that it was New Years Eve and it was not just a little peck. J
3. Last word you said: awesome!
4. Last song you sang: “Behind These Hazel Eyes” Kelly Clarkson in the car on the way to work this morning
5. Last person you hugged: hmm… Sarah S. (yesterday was her last day working here)
6. Last thing you laughed at: a phone call I had for work. It was funny.
7. What's in your CD player: a mixed cd of my favorites.
9. What socks are you wearing: black trouser socks
10. What's under your bed: nothing!
11. Current status: Single
12. Current taste (mouth): tuna (I’m eating lunch right now)
13. Current hair style: down and flipped out a bit at the end.
14. Current clothes: tan slacks, black cardigan set, black shoes
15. Current Job: Director of Chapter Services
16. Current longing: To be loved in return
17. Current desktop picture: nothing. It’s blue. I should work on that, huh.
18. Current worry: how I’m going to look good in a bikini by November. Ahh!
19. Current hate: people that won’t return my phone calls/e-mails/IM’s. My body!
20. Story behind your username: Dorothy’s ruby red slippers from wizard of oz, and 10 is my lucky/favorite number.
21. Current favorite article of clothing: NONE! I hate all my cloths, so I’m going shopping Saturday.
22. Favorite physical feature(s): eyes and smile.
23. Last CD that you bought: Hmmm… it’s been a while. Maybe Lindsay Lohan but I’ve had it for a long time.
24. Favorite place to be: right now it’s bed or on the couch in a vegetative state.
25. Least favorite place: any kind of doctor
26. Time you wake up in the morning: 6 am
27. If you could play a new instrument, what would it be? Guitar or piano
29. Current favorite word/saying: don’t really have one.
30. Favorite book: does Cosmo count? (I’m not really a fan of reading)
31. Favorite Movies: depends on my mood. “What Dreams May Come” for it’s artisticness, “Wizard of Oz” cause it’s classic, “Mean Girls” because it never gets old and is ALWAYS funny.
32. Favorite Songs: I have too many to type. Pretty much any Kelly Clarkson, Maroon 5, or Britney Spears.
34. One person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to: Grandpa Torda. I think that him and I would have been really close if he wouldn’t have died when I was so young.
35. Favorite day: any day off.
36. Where do you want to go: depends on my mood. Home, PA, NYC, Boston, England, CA
37. What is your career going to be: Student Affairs
39. What kind of car will you have: Honda Civic, fully loaded w/ a sunroof. Silver.
40. A random quote: “You only get one great love. And when that great love leaves you, a part of a man dies and he has nothing else to do but to go find the one he’ll love second best.”
41. Eye Color: brown when I’m pissed, green when I’m horny or tired, hazel the rest of the time.
42. Hair Color: brown
43. Righty or Lefty: I hold my pen with my right hand, but I write with a southpaw so you’d think I was a lefty. I also bat and golf like a lefty.
45. Zodiac Sign: Aquarius baby!
46.Innie or Outtie: Innie
DESCRIBE...
47. Your heritage: 75% Hungarian with a little Irish from dad
48. The shoes you wore today: black pumps
49. Your hair: didn’t we already do this one?
50. Your weakness: ice cream and chocolate
51. Your fears: Being alone…. Never finding somebody who loves me unconditionally who deserves me.
52. Your most recent secret? I only have one and I’m taking it to the grave!
54. Your thoughts first waking up: DAMN IT! Is it Saturday yet?
55. The first feature you notice in the opposite sex: eyes, smile, hands, butt. In that order
56. Your bedtime: normally around 10, sometimes earlier or later.
57. Your most missed companion: my cat, Diana, Jessi, and CJ. I miss Seth a lot right now too.
58. Your perfect pizza: pepperoni and pineapple with extra sauce.
59. Sweet and Chewy or Salty and Crunchy: depends on my mood.
60. Single or group dates: I'll take anything right now
61. Dogs or Cats: cats
62. Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton sweetened lemon ice tea
63. Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
64. Cappuccino or coffee?: um… hot chocolate
DO YOU...
65. Smoke: hell no.
66. Curse: occasionally
67. Sing: Often if not always. A lot less now though unfortunately.
68. Take a shower everyday: 95% of the time. There have been those lazy days where I stayed in pj’s all day though.
69. Have a crush: always!
71. Think you've been in love: I have been in love twice really.
72. Want to go to college: Been there, done that!
73. Want more than what you got: always
74. Want to get married: yes, but don’t I need a date first?
75. Type with your fingers in the right place: ha ha ha. Nope! I’m a hunting pecker!
76. Think you're attractive: I think I have a nice face, but other than that… hell no.
77. Think you're a health freak: no, I wish I were. I’m getting better though.
78. Get along with your parents: mom – always. Dad - sometimes
79. Play an instrument: if voice counts (which is did in college)
IN THE PAST 3 months:
80. Had an alcoholic beverage: yes!
82. Done a drug: only Excedrin migraine
83. Made Out: not since new years, and damn it I need some kissin. OH WAIT!!! I did get an unusually long kiss from a friend who was drunk when I went home for Seth’s funeral. That was weird. He propositioned me too. But I don’t count that because it really wasn’t the most enjoyable experience.
84. Go on a date: no
85. Eaten an entire box of Oreos: nope
86. Eaten sushi: GROSS!
87. Been dumped: No, but if I had been on a date in the last 9 months… I’m sure I would have been dumped.
88. Made homemade cookies: yes...just last week!
89. Been in love: that’s hard to answer
90. Gone skinny dipping: hell no
91. Dyed your hair: yes
92. Stolen anything: no
HAVE YOU EVER..
93. Had too much to drink: oh yeah
94. Been caught cheating: no
95. Been called a tease: yes, by my last boyfriend WHILE we were together.
96. Gotten beaten up: no, but I did beat the crap out of some chick in 8th grade.
97. Changed who you were to fit in: yeah
98. Cried at something beautiful: beautiful? No. sad, yes
99. Spent too much money on something you didn’t need?: no, because I’m very cautious w/my money now.
100. Cried when someone died?: Um… holy crap! Yes! I’m a baby when it comes to that, especially with Seth.
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| So I'm totally stoked because mom is taking my bro and I to Tampa, FL for a mini vaca in November. How sweet! I'm flying on my own from Indy and meeting them down there. I'm also staying a day later to hang out with my sister-mother whom I miss dearly and POSSIBLY my friend Alyson if she believed in returning people's phone calls. I'm so pumped, but I have no bathing suit to wear. So... looks like I really have to start watching what I eat and the gym is going to have to come REALLY soon. 4 months to look even 1/2 way decent in a bikini.... this may be difficult. Times like this I wish I had the will power to have an eating disorder.
Life otherwise is fine. I have no plans this weekend except a sangria party Saturday night at the gay man I'm in love with's apartment. I think we're having a bbq or something at my boy's apt on the 4th. Lots of drinking and that is a promise. Time for a meeting! Peace in the middle east! | | |
| It's always hard to recieve that call delivering bad news. My call came from Shannon, who is very rarely emotional and even when she is, she won't admit it. It was hard to hear her upset on the other end of the phone and not be able to give her a hug. When tragedy strikes, we need support. I feel really guilty, like this horrible person because I feel alone and unsupported lately, especially with recent events devestating the BGSU theatre community. I feel like such a horrible person being upset at my friends who won't return my calls and who weren't there for me last night. Isn't that a horrible thing to say? To commit such an act as my dear friend Seth did, he had to have been lonely for a long time. Unfortunatly, none of us know how he was feeling or what he was thinking. I want to ask why. I wish I knew what his thoughts were, how it felt at that instant. How much pain was he in? Where is he now? I've cirlcled through many emotions and many feelings in the last 24 hours. Immediate sadness, then anger and spite, and now I am numb. I feel numb. I feel nothing unless I am crying. I feel bad for people who are not used to dealing with this kind of loss. But just because I have dealt with it a lot in the past, I don't think that makes it any easier to cope with. My days at work have become painfully long, and my nights are filled with productivity in fear that I'll start to have feelings about what has happened. I guess I figure that if I keep myself pre-occupied then it won't be real. I wish this was just a nightmare. I wish I could be back at home to be a apart of the support system that is running through BG and Toledo right now. I may be driving home tomorrow at noon if there is a memorial service or something. I have to be back and at work by 8:30am on Sunday which sucks because it's a long drive home and back. Seth was an amazing, fun, crazy wild yet sensitive person whom we will all miss dearly. Lord give all of us, including Seth's parents stregnth during all of this. Seth, wherever you are, I hope that you are happier than you must have been when you left this world. I will love and miss you more than you will ever know. | | |
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